Anila Kitteon

Anila Kitteon
Sniff the Daffs

Sunday 28 April 2013

Can-ai-do?


I mentioned previously that we had changes coming up... and that my last post was written during my final week of work...

Work = supporting young people and their families to make positive changes. This was a council/government based job, and therefore presented it's own frustrations and restrictions. But I feel very confident that I have donated much of my time and energy into the county and society into which I was born. I also feel honoured to have met some people (mainly teens), who have been through much more emotional turmoil than they should have during their short lives and are still battling through. I took much pleasure in convincing them that despite their determined efforts to behave like a fool (often an display/example of their self-esteem), I still like them and they still have a million reasons to be the best they can be - which is more than they usually realise.

The cheekiest I got toward my own parents was when I frustratingly stated "I didn't ask to be born!!" and I have suggested to HG in the past that we could easily have been born as someone else; into a different family. I.e: a poor family in Africa, to gay parents, to a mother struggling with addictions etc. which is one of the things that encourages me to empathise and feel uber lucky with my lot. However, HG advises me that no, we couldn't be born as someone else I am the only one who is me, with my genes and my thoughts... now this man definitely amazes me and tickles my brain, but I do believe he is on the autistic spectrum and therefore sees things very black and white. I believe that it doesn't matter what/who/how my empathy is empowered, just that it is. My point being: I give a shit. And have found myself in very giving jobs - both paid, unpaid and in more than one at once. To the extent that (as noted in previous post), my personal life has been affected. I'm not whinging; many have far more demanding jobs/lives than I do. I do however, pride myself in continuing to make an effort in my relationship, as does HG. 

This is assisted by the decision that has released the pressure felt by many others of our age: to live our lives child-free... (another time, another post).

SO! Having given a lot of me, my energy & emotions to Blighty, I feel no guilt in leaving both my job and the country, for HG & me to take up a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. Ok, an ripple of guilt at leaving the Young People, staff (some brilliant friends) and my positive reputation & general good-doings. But not enough to stop me.

I'll break the story down into a few blog posts, as this story could get lengthy!